Frances's Perspective:

By late November I was certain that I wanted to marry David. He assured me that he was just waiting on a “few more things” before he would be ready to propose. The first week of December, we visited Spokane for my sister Beth’s wedding and he got to meet much of my extended family. He asked my parents for permission to ask me to marry him, which they granted. Two weeks later, we drove to New Orleans to celebrate Christmas with his family. At the time, I wrestled with my desire to be engaged (moving towards the fulfillment of my vocation) and my desire to be patient and trust in God’s (and David’s) timing. Little did I know that that patience would soon be rewarded!


Christmas and the day after were blessed opportunities to spend time with his mom’s side of the family and his dad. David told me on Tuesday that Wednesday would be a special day, just for us. He had a couple of surprises in store for me – that was my only hint.

The morning of December 27th, David woke me up at 7:15 am and asked me to get ready for Mass at St. Dominic’s. We took too long getting ready and ended up arriving at Mass too late to feel we had fully participated (therefore, we chose not to receive the Eucharist). This obviously disappointed David, so he asked the priest about other options for Mass that day. David then asked me whether I would be interested in attending the noon Mass at St. Louis Cathedral in downtown New Orleans. I assured him I would be delighted to return to that lovely church, which is both historically and architecturally significant AND meaningful to me. During our March visit to N’awlins, David and I had visited the cathedral, prayed a deeply moving Stations of the Cross together (with excellent meditations out of Faith and Family Magazine), attended the noon Mass offered by a holy young priest and bursting with schoolchildren and their Dominican sister teachers, and found solace back in the church after a harrowing (for me) walk down Bourbon Street (only David’s reading of Psalm 23 could center me). I definitely wanted to return.

With plans made, we returned to the car for a light breakfast. Then David invited me to pray a Rosary with him in the courtyard between St. Dominic’s church and school. We found a spot on the grass in the sun and sat down in the midst of construction workers busily repairing parts of the school around us. In this place full of significance for David (he had attended St. Dominic’s parish and school all through his youth), we offered the glorious mysteries for discernment in our courtship. The prayer was rich and bonding. I began to suspect, from David’s reflections and emotional engagement in the Rosary prayers, that he was preparing to propose to me. But I wondered in silence.

After our Rosary, David helped me stand up and told me he really wanted to get to the Adoration Chapel before it closed. He took my hand and pulled me across the street to the chapel. After we knelt before the Blessed Sacrament inside, David asked me to sit while he went and spoke to the only other person there. She got up and left the chapel. Now I really began to expect that this was the moment. David sat beside me and explained that he had been bold and asked the other adorer to give us some time alone with Jesus. Then he pulled his Bible out of his backpack and told me that he had chosen six passages which he wanted to share with me. One by one, he found the passages he had marked with numbered post-it notes and pictures of Pope Benedict XVI (torn out of the National Catholic Register). He read to me about the Word of God and Light of the World (John 1:1-5, 10-11, 14), the Good Shepherd’s care for us (Psalm 23), God’s commandments of love (Matthew 22:36-40), God’s plan for husbands and wives (Ephesians 5:21-31), the true nature of love (1 Corinthians 13:1-13), and the bridegroom’s rejoicing over his bride (Isaiah 62:1-5). Half way through his reading, the woman returned to the chapel, along with an older woman. I felt self-conscious as David continued to read aloud and, sadly, was somewhat distracted from his reading. Sensing this, he finished quickly. Still, it was precious to hear the younger woman crying as she, too, listened to God’s Word, specially chosen by David.

David set the Bible aside and pulled a box out of his backpack. Then he stood up, took my hand, and pulled me over to stand in front of Jesus in the monstrance. As our adrenaline surged, David knelt in front of me on both knees and explained his resolve and reasons to ask me to be his wife, and how he would strive to honor and serve me. (Neither of us can remember exactly what he said!) Then he opened the box to reveal a ring and asked, “Will you marry me?”

I dropped to my knees in front of him and answered, “Yes.” Then I wrapped my arms around him and whispered my prayer that God would grant me the grace to love David well and take good care of him. David leaned back from me and said, “I offer you this ring as a symbol of my commitment.” In my delight I had forgotten this most precious gift! He slipped the beautiful ring on my finger and we embraced again. The ladies behind us sighed and congratulated us. In the midst of prayers and jubilation, we shared our first kiss (my first kiss ever!). Then we turned to the Lord and offered Him our thanks and praise. I felt so unworthy and utterly grateful to God that I laid down prostrate on the carpet in front of Jesus and begged His divine assistance in our marriage.

After some time of prayer and expressions of affection, David and I stood up and took our seats. Shortly afterward, the two women behind us asked us if we would like to join them in praying a Rosary. David and I explained that we had prayed ours already but were most grateful for their invitation. We sat in silence as they began, and were surprised and delighted when they offered their Rosary for “this newly engaged young couple”! We stayed and listened to their meaningful prayers and meditations, basking in the grace God poured out on us. At the conclusion of the Rosary, we collected our things and thanked the women for their prayers and encouragement. Then we bid adieu to Jesus and hustled to the car.

We parked in the French Quarter and ran part of the way to the cathedral, arriving just a little bit late at the Mass. I was delighted to discover the same young, holy priest presiding at Mass (he gave a great homily on the beloved disciple, since it was St. John’s feast day, and spoke of the amazing privilege we have to receive God in the Eucharist). After Mass, David and I approached the sacristy to ask for the priest’s blessing on my ring and our engagement. A guard let us into the sacristy, we shared our news with the priest, and he joined our hands and prayed over us. I remember him saying that my diamond ring will be a symbol of our love in its infancy. Oh, how excited I am for our love to grow and mature!

We left the Cathedral and David made a phone call for the next surprise. While waiting, we strolled through Jackson Square, a landscaped park with pathways, benches, fountains, and a statue of Andrew Jackson atop his horse. After sitting, cuddling, and talking, David led us to the street in front of the square where Ms. Rose, David’s sister Katy, and her friend Beth pulled up, jumped out to give me congratulatory hugs (they had all known of David’s plans for weeks), and then handed us picnic blankets and a bag filled with a delicious gourmet picnic (from La Madeleine, a popular French bakery). David and I thanked them profusely and returned to the Jackson Square lawn to enjoy the French Quarter atmosphere with blue skies, a warm sun, lively jazz, a romantic picnic, strawberries Romanov and a whole lot of love!